my own book

[ Break Out ]










 Written by: Esma Camel


Chapter 1:


It’s easy to find a goal, it’s easy to start something, but why is it hard to finish the things we started.

I always find myself looking for reasons and answers to stuff I shouldn’t really care about. What makes us think so much about useless stuff, but forget about the important stuff.

It’s like where stuck in a big round circle and you just can’t seem to find your way out. 

Is it because we don’t want to get out, or is it because we are afraid to get out. To me it’s very simple: getting out means being strong and having the strength to do your own thing, but most of the time its being afraid that makes us make the wrong choices. Do you rather take a risk and be happy, or keep living in the circle and knowing your safe but not fully satisfied.

To most people the choice is easily made. Often people choose the second one cause they rather be safe then sorry. And you know they may be right, but for me there’s not that much to risk cause if you’re not happy why shouldn’t you go look for your own happiness, you can’t lose something if you don’t have it.

I started writing because this is the best way I can express my feelings and give my opinion about everything, I’m not an expert don’t get me wrong, I’m just an 19 year girl that has her own perspective and wants to share it with you. You probably think why should I even continue reading this, well you started reading so you might as well finish it. Like I said at the beginning:why is it hard to finish the things we started’ we people attend to start things without finishing them. So I dare you to finish reading this and I’m sure you will feel satisfied. Starting something new mostly feels incredible you feel like you can take on the whole world, and why shouldn’t you feel that way?  The first couple weeks are like heaven everything is going the right way, just like you expected.

But then before you know it everything is going down hills. You feel like everything is turned against you, and no one wants you to be happy and someone is sabotaging you. No matter what people tell you or try to help  it’s always not good enough. And then after a few months you just quit.

You don’t feel the use of doing something to finish what you started, it’s like everything you do or touch has been cursed. I know sometimes it’s hard to even carry on, but when you want sometimes so bad you should fight for it, it doesn’t matter if people think you can’t, it doesn’t matter how bad things are looking at the moment. In my heart I know everything happens for a reason, and you won’t be happy or fully satisfied with the fact that you know you didn’t do everything you could.


If you start losing hope, it’s like losing yourself to this ungrateful world.

The world can’t give you up, if you don’t give up on yourself.

When you believe in the good, you leave no room for the bad.

They say bad things happen to good people, and that bad people may have the best luck. But I think that’s the most pathetic thing I ever heard. Everyone has to deal with bad luck, maybe some of you more than others. But that doesn’t mean that you should feel sorry for yourself, and stop living your life and just do nothing about it. I promise you this you will automatic stop living your life when you stop breathing. If you want luck you will have to great your own luck. And like they say: After the rain there is always sunshine.




Most people wonder why should it even rain first before we get to see the sunshine and feel the warmth burning on our skin. Well ask yourself this question: If I could get everything without having to sacrifice anything for it, would it be worth as much as it would have if I did have to make some scarifies to get it?

When you work for something really hard, it immediately becomes very important to you and it will have a special meaning to you.

Often we wish to trade places with someone else, you never see what you got but always want the stuff you don’t have. Jealous cause they got money? jealous cause they can do whatever they want? Jealous cause they have everything you wanted to have.

Why can’t we be glad with the fact that we are alive and doing well? Let me tell you something about life:


There are things in life that don’t make sense,
but everything happens for a reason,
Even when it hurts I guess.
When pain becomes your friend , and your smile disappears,
your life becomes a mess.
Your desire 2 live life to the fullest becomes less.
You can’t handle it anymore, you just want the hurt to go away
The little faith you still had, fades away.
Your crying in the inside, from the outside no one sees. That the pain is killing you
but you’re scared to show, cause at the end they always leave.

No one knows, no one cares
No one shows , No one ever said :
Have faith 2 carry on , you may think your weak but I can see your strong.
Don’t listen when they say you can’t,
There wrong , they judge without knowing you do have the strength 2 move on.

Life can be hard , but also great.
When I look at the sky, I know this will end,
Cause God never forgets, He will make sure everything turns out like he ment.

He gives you faith, he makes you strong,
Just believe that one day this pain will be all gone,
One day you will  smile , it makes it worth waiting for a while.

Don’t give up, Don’t let it get you down,
Without the dark, you wouldn’t have seen the light,
Be  thankful for every moment, even the pain part
Life is short, and you already wasted a part.








There's more out there for you and me. I’m not dreaming no more, but living the dream. There is a whole new world opening for me. And you just got to believe it’s not only ment for me , but for you too because we are all the same. I’m not better or stronger, I’m a believer and who believes will find the way to luck.

When you look for something, you will never find it. When you let it go, it will find you. It’s ironic how things go, mostly when you try to forget something and after a while you do, it always comes back to you. Is it good or is it wrong ?  Sometimes it’s better to keep things like they are. If you close something never open it again, because you closed it for a reason. But if you do decide to open it again, just know that if you go back looking for the lost smile, you’re also going to find the lost tear.

There where happiness is, is also pain. You can’t have one without the other.

Sometimes it’s good to go through the pain before finding happiness, it will make you appreciate the things you have more.

Some people may say watching TV shows that entertain us are useless. But I find my wisdom in those TV shows. One of the TV shows that made me realize how cruel this world can be is Prison Break. It entertains us, but it also learns us a lesson without even realizing that. One sentence

 I will never forget : ωє are all ѕтuck in тнє prison we created for ourselves.

Prison break also shows that if you fight for the good, you will concern it all. You may lose hope and people along the way. Sometimes you just want to close your eyes without having to open them again. But there’s always light at the end of a dark tunnel. Keep fighting and never lose hope. Your destiny lies in your hand. Create your own luck cause no one will do it for you. Choose wisely cause only you can decide which way you’re heading, is it the path of struggle and having to fight for what you want and creating your own luck, Or is it the path of lies and taking someone’s luck to make it your own ?

So I don’t agree when people say: Shows that entertain us are no good. Because thanks to the amazing show prison break I learned the most important thing, fight for the good, never lose hope, look beyond what your eyes can see, only your heart and feelings can set you free.

We people often create a wall around our heart, no one can get in and you can’t get out.

We try to protect ourselves by building this wall, but at the end we don’t protect anything at all. There where can’t be pain will not be happiness. Its sounds so cliché but it’s true, there’s no easy way out without losing yourself along the way. Word of wisdom choose wisely, cause when you make your choice there’s no way back.  At the end: We are all prisoners of our own identity.


Break out:

I need to break out, find myself again.

I need to be free, I won’t let them make me or break me.

I’m going to create my own luck, I need to get out cause right now I’m stuck.

I need to make them see, I’m better than this, they don’t have the right to take my freedom away from me.

Which way is the right way to head, is it right or left.

This world makes it hard to be innocent, makes it hard for you not to lie.

Will I still remain the same person, or will the innocent in me after a while just die.

Can I find my way out, will I make it through.

Is it possible for me to be free, is it possible for you?





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